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I'm a better person when I'm tan and holding a margarita
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I'm a better person when I'm tan and holding a boosted tea
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If you're testing my waters you better know how to swim
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I wish my bank account refilled as fast as my laundry basket
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I wanna have a perfect body but food calls me like the ocean calls moana
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I used to be cool now I just argue with a miniature version of myself
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I used to be cool now I just argue with a miniature version of my husband
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I spend a lot of time holding the refrigerator door open looking for answers
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I pretend coffee helps but I'm still an asshole
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I pretend caffeine helps but I'm still an asshole
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I may look like a potato now but one day I'll turn into fries..
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Homebody Club
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